Based on a true-life story spanning a period of fifty-plus years. Sailor, the main character, struggled all his life to find the meaning of life. He searched and searched for the true belief and practice of Christianity and religion in general. Deeply torn with the concept of love and relationship that included his siblings and commitment in holy matrimony. His entire life was a life of schooling, education, and revelation about himself and interacting with others. His career in the United States Armed Forces would reveal much of his fears and catapult him into the real world of life. Hadar Shmaryahu Ya'akov is the Hebrew name of the author, Timothy James Durden Sr. A career in the United States Navy was the catalyst for the author to write. His relationship with his brothers was the motivation for him to write. Despair after despair and death after death were perhaps his inspirations to minister to wayward youths in the Armed Forces of the United States of America.