Rules of Estrangement
Autor Joshua Colemanen Limba Engleză Hardback – 2 mar 2021
Observăm în ultimii ani o tendință socială tot mai prezentă, definită adesea ca o „epidemie tăcută”: înstrăinarea dintre părinți și copiii lor ajunși la maturitate. Într-o cultură care pune preț pe împlinirea individuală și pe eliminarea oricărui obstacol din calea fericirii personale, relațiile de familie au devenit, în mod paradoxal, mai fragile. Rules of Estrangement abordează această temă delicată nu doar din perspectiva psihologului cu 40 de ani de experiență, ci și prin prisma trăirii personale a lui Joshua Coleman, care a experimentat el însuși ruptura de propria fiică. Considerăm că forța acestui volum rezidă în refuzul de a simplifica lucrurile. Autorul evită clișeele care dau vina exclusiv pe „părinți toxici” sau pe „copii răsfățați”, preferând să exploreze mecanismele complexe ale alienării. Notăm cu interes modul în care Coleman plasează conflictul familial într-un context sociologic larg, explicând cum valorile contemporane redefinesc datoria filială și rolul parental. Pe aceeași linie cu Navigating Family Estrangement de Karl Melvin, lucrarea oferă o perspectivă clinică solidă, dar se diferențiază prin accentul pus pe limbajul concret al reconcilierii. Coleman oferă cititorului instrumente emoționale specifice pentru a iniția dialogul, fără a garanta succesul, dar oferind demnitate procesului de vindecare. Această abordare continuă munca începută de autor în When Parents Hurt, rafinând strategiile de gestionare a vinei și a rușinii. Este o lectură care nu doar analizează ruptura, ci construiește punți, oferind un ghid practic pentru părinții care se simt blocați într-un exil emoțional neașteptat.
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Specificații
ISBN-10: 0593136861
Pagini: 320
Dimensiuni: 160 x 240 x 29 mm
Greutate: 0.53 kg
Editura: Harmony/Rodale/Convergent
De ce să citești această carte
Recomandăm această carte părinților care trec prin experiența dureroasă a rupturii de copiii lor adulți și caută o cale de înțelegere, nu doar de consolare. Cititorul câștigă o perspectivă clară asupra motivelor culturale ale înstrăinării și primește un set de instrumente de comunicare testate clinic. Este o resursă esențială pentru a transforma vinovăția paralizantă în acțiune constructivă sau, acolo unde este cazul, într-o acceptare sănătoasă.
Despre autor
Joshua Coleman, PhD, este un psiholog american de renume, specializat în relații de familie și mariaj. Este Senior Fellow la Council on Contemporary Families și co-fondator al centrului Standing Together, dedicat conștientizării fenomenului de înstrăinare familială. Expertiza sa este recunoscută la nivel global, fiind citat frecvent în publicații precum The New York Times și The Atlantic. Dincolo de activitatea clinică și editorială, care include titluri de succes precum The Marriage Makeover, Coleman contribuie la mediul academic prin prezentări la Harvard și Weill Cornell, îmbinând rigoarea științifică cu o empatie profundă derivată din propria experiență de viață.
Descriere
Readers and professionals agree, this book could help you!
'A Ray of Hope' ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Reader review
'A really helpful book for estranged parents' ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Reader Review
'I feel so much lighter after reading this book' ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Reader review
'I've seen many parents and adult children grappling with these issues, and this is exactly the book they have all been waiting for.'
Lori Gottlieb
Has your adult child cut off contact with you?
How can you heal the pain and start to build a bridge back to them?
Labelled a silent epidemic by a growing number of therapists and researchers, estrangement is one of the most disorienting and painful experiences of a parent's life. Popular opinion typically tells a one-sided story of parents who got what they deserved or overly entitled adult children who wrongly blame their parents. However, the reasons for alienation are far more complex and varied. As a result of rising rates of individualism, an increasing cultural emphasis on happiness, growing economic insecurity, and a historically recent perception that parents are obstacles to personal growth, many parents find themselves forever shut out of the lives of their adult children and grandchildren.
As a trusted psychologist whose own daughter cut off contact for several years and eventually reconciled, Dr Joshua Coleman is uniquely qualified to guide parents in navigating these fraught interactions. He helps to alleviate the ongoing feelings of shame, hurt, guilt, and sorrow that commonly attend these dynamics. By placing estrangement into a cultural context, Dr Coleman helps parents better understand the mindset of their adult children and teaches them how to implement the strategies for reconciliation and healing that he has seen work in his forty years of practice. Rules of Estrangement gives parents the language and the emotional tools to engage in meaningful conversation with their child, the framework to cultivate a healthy relationship moving forward, and the ability to move on if reconciliation is no longer possible.
While estrangement is a complex and tender topic, Dr Coleman's insightful approach is based on empathy and understanding for both the parent and the adult child.
Recenzii
Dr Coleman is one of the few experts in the western world on family estrangement. This book both comforts and challenges parents who are estranged from their adult children, lighting up a path for how they may repair their broken relationships. It offers excellent insights into the sociology and psychology of family relationships, which we too often assume are always supportive, close and functional. I would recommend this book to anyone looking to learn from years of refined specialist practice in this important field.
A must-read guide for any parent in a troubled relationship with their adult child.
Family estrangement is shrouded in shame and secrecy, yet in Dr Coleman's experienced hands, both the causes and consequences of estrangement become far easier to comprehend. Crucially, Dr Coleman explores the complexity of estrangement whilst extending kindness and compassion for all involved. Rules of Estrangement is essential reading for anyone looking to gain insight and understanding on this topic.
I have, for many years, recommended people to see Dr Coleman, but until I read this book I don't think I ever knew the extraordinary range of his gifts. An inspirational book.
While this is a book primarily written for parents, his compassionate view of the estranged adult child offers helpful insights for all generations involved.
Rejecting glib indictments of 'toxic parents' or 'ungrateful kids', Coleman offers calming advice on ways that estranged families can recover or move on.
Joshua Coleman has provided a beautifully written book that describes painful disruptions in relationships between parents and their adult children. His wise and authoritative strategies and specific tips will prove to be essential for both younger and older generations and for clinicians who attempt to foster hope and relationship repair in these poignant family ruptures.
Joshua Coleman provides compassionate and useful advice to parents and their adult children who are trying to navigate the minefield of past family experience. His work with families is engaging, informative, exceedingly helpful.
A very thoughtful book filled with great wisdom and care. The advice is heartfelt, intelligent, and will be very helpful to many parents facing an array of complicated issues in their relationship with their adult children.
Shows how to navigate the challenges of estrangement with compassion and empathy, and offers adults, and their children, a path forward.