The psychotic interludes which played a part in the lives of those in this medical journal were chaotic. For the sake of the grief of those who were studied, being my family members and those I love dearly, I cannot say that I fully understand schizophrenia, but in my own experiences of psychotic episodes I described grief. The paranormal consequences of those biting the bullet in the experiences of angels and demons written of in this book, chaotic but not masochistic belief systems in the family pitted against itself, the consequences of rough nature . . . these spiritual contracts showed me a bulletproof nature in my family. My dad showed me compassion and my brother showed me loving distance, loyalty and kindness. My mother showed me her grief and I adored her for it. I began to believe in the Carmelite Church. That was, until I saw what it was that spurred the creation of a medical journal.