In author J. R. Helton's hilarious prose, Jake inimitably narrates the ups and downs of being a functional user of marijuana, cocaine, MDMA, alcohol, nicotine, brand name hydrocodone and countless other drugs readily available and commonly partaken of in modern America. Readers follow Jake on car rides with his coke dealer to menace connections in supermarket parking lots, buying prescription opiates from a megacorporate health and beauty clinic, and falling in love with his wife while on a series of mushroom trips through San Antonio and Austin.