Caught in the middle of the pandemic, unaware of which way to turn. I turned inwardly. I could not find my answer in the bottom of a bottle. Reality hit, I had hit rock bottom. Fear gripped my mind as I pondered what would happen to me in my not so distant future. My life was great as a server so I thought. Covid-19 was the number one cause of massive unemployment, I was struck. I had had my fill of the "quarantine" parties, depression began to settle in quickly. There was no possible way I could get lower. My options were few, something had to change, that change began with me. But how, I had been forced to comply by isolation regulation rules to sit still. Stillness is what I needed to gather my mind. My mind had become the battlefield and I was the solider on the front line. I had two options remain the same or passionately pursue change.