Halfwit conmen Andrew and Bruce live in a vintage VW camper, running from the law in pursuit of their lifelong dream: to move to Paris as a chef and a poet. But their not-so-haute cuisine and poetry are as fauxed-up as their French, which they learn from a cassette tape of insults. All they need is one last scam to make their dreams come true... So when they meet Charlotte, a blind girl with a penchant for pills, they're sure she's the easy mark who will get them to easy street. But the merde hits the fan when they find out this femme fatale has plans of her own. For fans of Carl Hiaasen's Razor Girl and Fredrik Backman's A Man Called Ove, Jonny Effing Lucas' Confrontational French is a madcap tale of friendship, love, and roadkill cuisine.