Zack Zapp and Milton Burdass-Nuttall, two unemployed young poops, are tricked into signing up as priests by a fast-talking church recruiter, who forgot to mention priests don't date. Enjoying a night out on the town, they are secretly filmed kissing the same lemon-haired girl, the footage posted on her website. When Zack next falls in love with a British spy and Milton with a CIA operative, the two reluctant clerics set out on a mission to destroy the incriminating footage before they are revealed not only as men of the cloth but also libertines of the worst kind. Before long they are up to their clerical collars burgling bishops, blackmailing cardinals and even taking a crack at the papal safe.