Thirteen-year-old Joey Derby didn't mean to unleash monster mayhem at the town zoo. His brother made him do it. Honest. Now a horde of behemoths, globs, and foop-foops have invaded the park and threaten to devour him. His furious parents might just let them. To redeem himself and save the town, Joey will need to overcome his anxiety, his reckless brother, a vindictive zookeeper, and a colossal beast or two (or twenty). It will take a little ingenuity, a lot of luck, and some help from a few unlikely sources for Joey to pull this off and live to tell about it. The No Such Things is a humorous creature adventure that summons the reader to reconsider first impressions, especially when it comes to perceived monsters, both animal and human. For Ages 8-12.