This book was written for people under nine years of age. Most people over nine are too sophisticated for anything I might write. Some of these stories are mostly true, others are mostly fiction. I have embellished some of the true ones. That is one of our rights. It is called "Freedom FOR the Press." Being retired, I have a lot of time on my hands. I sleep eight hours a day and idle away the other eighteen. Wait That's twenty-six hours. I never was good at math.