Rogues' Galley: Matthew J Turner

ROGUES' GALLEY IS A JAUNTY NEW ADVENTURE IN A YARN SPUN FROM THE LORE OF UPRYNENOS, THE RIOTOUS FANTASY SERIES SCRIBBLED DOWN BY MATTHEW J TURNER.

After ferrying a pair of road-weary wastrels across the soupy Font, Montigriano, infamous captain of the Dredger of Woe, has travelled west to attend a lavish wedding. A singular honour for an acquaintance of his distant relative. Not averse to indulging in a drop of celebratory rum, an incendiary toast lands our intrepid Maestro of the Surf in a spot of bother.

Cast to the gutter and abandoned by his closest matey, Monty clings to the charity of a passing dwarf, himself late for the glamorous nuptials. Spurred by looming sobriety to weasel his way back to the rowdy, ale-fuelled revelry, Montigriano regales his saviour with a fantastical tale of his past exploits. A story of dread. A yarn brimming with seaborne calamities and a confrontation with the Eternal Shuffler! Oh, and one vexing albatross.

Charged with uncovering an eastwards passage, Monty leads the ragtag crew of the barnacle-encrusted Ancient Mariner. Together they sail into the unknown, guided by little more than a dubious chart and a wizard cursed with the navigational wherewithal of a bucket o' chum. Deaf to the concerns of his disgruntled maties, Captain Montigriano must negate the threat of mutiny, fell magic, tempestuous weather and worse - his own incompetence!

Best hold on to your winkles as we embark upon Rogues' Galley. A crude, grog-addled shanty for the ages! Sure, it doesn't rhyme, but you'll have a whale of a time!