The key to being in a scene is to be seen, and nowhere is more important than in a record store, where the employees are cooler than you and know every big band a year before anyone else does. But what happens when you wake up and realize that you're 30 years old and life is passing you by? What about your hope and dreams? Life won't wait. If you're like Pretentious Record Store Guy then you're 5'11" rail thin, ridiculously good looking and your hair is the elixir from which dreams are made. This is his story.