Gerald has a problem: he wants to date Melanie, but she doesn't want to date him. They're good friends that enjoy each other's company most of the time, but the longer Gerald analyzes the issue, the more disturbed he becomes. What starts as an emotional diatribe against unrequited love is slowly broken down into its existentialist components, utilizing the works of Kierkegaard, Sartre, & other philosophers to focus on the central issue Gerald is unable to quell-the bizarre concept of his "minus existence."