What is the minimal LISP language that can interpret itself? What is the smallest LISP that can compile itself? What was LISP hacking like in the age of punch cards, teletypes, and mainframe computers? This text plays with the theme of minimal LISP by providing several implementations from a simple metacircular evaluator to a full compiler that emits a single, self-contained C program. The discussion is embedded in reflections on what hacking looked like in the early days of LISP.