The author was shoved into the workforce at age five, and he's had some of the most bizarre jobs ever since (such as dressing as the Scarecrow and singing for Judy Garland, auditioning for The Dating Game while on LSD, and running a projector at a porn theater owned by a rabbi). Fans of David Sedaris will love "If I Only Had a Brain," a collection of gems that takes you through one hilarious work-related misadventure after another.