Clyde and Lindsey Welles are high school sweethearts. After ten years of bliss, however, Clyde has inexplicably gone cold. Is it their new neighbors, former class rivals/lovers? Is it his job? Or is it all just Lindsey's fault? The new neighbors, Dirk and Lisa Tilden, act weirder now than when they were trying to poach Clyde for themselves ten years ago... As Lindsey struggles with her dormant lover, she has turned to petty theft to fill the void... Is it possible for a human being to be completely rid of emotional and physical trauma, even if it comes purely in the form of baked goods? Lindsey Welles aims to find out. Clyde Welles just wants another drink. Dirk Tilden wants to complete his mission. Lisa Tilden just wants to feel human.