I explore my intertwining of spiritual/soul with my ego/ human make up. Even with opulence due to the family invention of Vaseline, I didn't have an easy life. Scrutinizing my ancestry to uncover our origin of child abuse, I describe the abuse didn't start with me. I discuss a belief in reincarnation, which started with a near death life changing experience at age thirteen. In conclusion, I discuss behaviors used in the maintenance of my serene, loving attitude. My attitude has been obtained though my difficult life lessons, which are now a transformed powerful, positive force.