Bumble Pie

I have often succumbed to the 'let me fix you' books that inundate every banner ad and airport kiosk around the globe. Ripping dollars from my wallet, I have chased facades of financial freedom, super-model weight loss, and even sprouting a few inches. My vertically challenged self loved the 'boots that boost' and qualified me for additional E-Harmony matches.

However, traditional self-help approaches heap a conscience flogging burden on YOU. You are broke because you spend like the government, you are 'husky' because you shotgun queso, and you lack inches because you provoked the gene dealer. If you accept you are the problem, then money will secure 'head wrenches' to screw you right. Er, on tight. That approach is certain to bung up fragile egos.

'Bumble Pie' utilizes a refreshingly simple approach and perfectly suited for those seeking hair-trigger fixes. In short, the 'Pie' suggests:

* lowering your expectations. You are not the problem, the bar is. Unless it serves adult libations, chunk all bars. This intuitive approach makes you better the second you roll out of bed.

*surrounding yourself with others who have adopted the same blas approach to life. 'Success' will always be relative and if you 'dine with swine', you are then basking in the bell curve sweet spot.

*perusing the botched life lessons within. Written by an expert at 'losering', you will learn what not to do and therefore face the day happier, skinnier, and smarter. It's my S%&* Show Guarantee.