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Be More Assertive (Teach Yourself - General)

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Notă GoodReads:
en Limba Engleză Paperback – 24 Sep 2010

Assertiveness isn’t only pleasanter than fighting and much nicer than always giving in, it’s a more efficient way of behaving, too. What you need is to accept and recognize and acknowledge that you matter. You have as much right as anyone else to have what you need and want. Not more and certainly not less – but as much. Being assertive is not a natural response. We have evolved when under threat to respond with ‘fight or flight’. Being assertive means learning to overcome this instinctive and often inappropriate reaction. To be assertive, you need to retrain yourself and to learn a toolbox of strategies, ideas and approaches to help yourself.

Probably the most important strategy you need to learn to become assertive is to use ‘I’. We make ‘You’ statements for several reasons. ‘Look what you made me do’ or ‘You make me so angry!’ blames the other person for what has happened and lets us off the hook. A statement such as ‘Everyone thinks you’re lazy’ avoids taking responsibility for angry or critical remarks by saying they belong to someone else. When being assertive, you need to own what you say. Being assertive is standing up for what you feel, think and mean in a direct statement of your feelings and needs. A useful formula to use is to say: When… (Describe the situation or behaviour that is troubling you.) I feel… (Say how it makes you feel.) Because… (Say what it is about the situation or behaviour that upsets you.) What I would like is… (Explain what you would like to be different.) Summary: * do you lack the confidence to say no? * do you feel that people sometimes take you for granted? * would you like strategies that will help you communicate your needs openly and calmly? Teach yourself Assertiveness will help you if you're struggling to make yourself heard. It will show you how becoming more assertive can change every part of your life for the better, and give you techniques and strategies to make assertive behaviour a part of your life. You will learn how to give and receive criticism, make and receive compliments, cope with anger, fear and, most importantly, to say 'no' without feeling guilty.

NOT GOT MUCH TIME? One, five and ten-minute introductions to key principles to get you started.

AUTHOR INSIGHTS Lots of instant help with common problems and quick tips for success, based on the author's many years of experience. TEST YOURSELF Tests in the book and online to keep track of your progress.

THINGS TO REMEMBER Quick refreshers to help you remember the key facts. TRY THIS Innovative exercises illustrate what you've learnt and how to use it. written by a leading counsellor, agony aunt and established 'teach yourself' author features self-assessment quizzes, exercises and case studies - and will feature extra online material will help readers to tackle any situation which calls for assertiveness, from personal relationships to dealing with cold callers a category of title that continues to perform well and lends itself to strong backlist sales

Table of Contents:
Part One: Theory
Chapter 01: What is assertive behaviour?
Chapter 02: Assertive communication Part Two: Making a Start
Chapter 03: You are worth it!
Chapter 04: Building an assertive body image
Chapter 05: Give and Take
Chapter 06: Coping with put downs
Chapter 07: First steps in handling anger
Chapter 08: Laughter is the best medicine Part Three: Moving forward
Chapter 09: Assertive relationships
Chapter 10: Assertiveness at work
Chapter 11: Assertive parenting
Chapter 12: People problems The Ten Golden Rules of Assertiveness Closing thoughts

About the Author(s): Suzie Hayman is well known for her work as a Relate-trained counsellor and agony aunt on television and in a variety of different papers and magazines. She is the author of over 24 books and gives advice to hundreds of people through her website www.agony-aunt.com.
Readership: anyone looking to be more assertive

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Specificații

ISBN-13: 9781444102208
ISBN-10: 1444102206
Pagini: 272
Dimensiuni: 130 x 197 x 17 mm
Greutate: 0.22 kg
Editura: John Murray Press
Colecția Teach Yourself - General
Seria Teach Yourself - General

Locul publicării: United Kingdom

Cuprins

Part One: Theory Chapter 01: What is assertive behaviour? Chapter 02: Assertive communication Part Two: Making a Start Chapter 03: You are worth it! Chapter 04: Building an assertive body image Chapter 05: Give and Take Chapter 06: Coping with put downs Chapter 07: First steps in handling anger Chapter 08: Laughter is the best medicine Part Three: Moving forward Chapter 09: Assertive relationships Chapter 10: Assertiveness at work Chapter 11: Assertive parenting Chapter 12: People problems The Ten Golden Rules of Assertiveness Closing thoughts


Notă biografică

Suzie Hayman is well known for her work as a Relate-trained counsellor and agony aunt on television and in a variety of different papers and magazines. She is the author of over 24 books and gives advice to hundreds of people through her website www.agony-aunt.com.